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Put down the cookies for a moment. Can you bring yourself to the table for your dog? You might be very surprised to learn how powerful social interaction can be as a reward.
A trainer friend asked me, "Do you use treats
when working with a dog who is worried, fearful, reactive or otherwise having
trouble, or do you use social contact (voice tone, touch, etc) as the
reward? I am certain that “it depends” is an important part of the
answer. But what do you use most frequently?"
I had to chuckle -- It Depends is my bumpersticker
for life. Most of all, it depends on what the dog says works for him
in the moment. But how specifically to achieve that?
First, we back
up a bit to what I call the First Elemental Question: "Hello?" By
beginning here, at the most elemental point of any relationship, I am
asking the animal if they would be interested in a conversation.
Answers range from YES! to "maybe" to NO to "go away, you're scaring
me" to "go away or I will bite you." And all shades of grey in between.
What I do after that initial question has been asked depends very much
on the answer. For this article, let's focus on normal dogs without any
intense fear, irritation, anger, frustration or the dogs who are
asocial or simply disinterested in ME. Let's assume the dog has said,
"Okay - I could consider a conversation with you."
Initially, I frequently employ a strong combo of very high value treats plus
(always, forever, no exception, the real deal)
authentic engagement -- social contact. This is built of eye contact,
body language, voice, breathing, intensity, movement and touch. The
specific combination I create is tailored to that specific dog. The
dog's behavior drives my behavior.
Regardless of
the specific combo, however, one thing quickly becomes apparent to the
dog: I am really present for him, really alert to him, and adjusting
my behavior based on what he does. This is powerful stuff for any
social animal.he
combination is adjusted (as fast as I am humanly capable) to keep it
effective
for that dog in that moment.
Long before I work with the dog on something
specific however, I've been assessing what he finds valuable & interesting,
and observing how he utilizes space socially, what he does in response to me
and my body language, eye contact, movements and voice, and his response to the
treats (or toys) available. So then I have a starting point from which I
move into working with him. All of that happens really fast, by the way. And keeps changing, moment to moment.
How much the social contact means of course depends on the individual dog and
that relationship. Just as it wouldn't matter much if a stranger told you
how wonderful you were but did hand out $1000 bills as he told you, but coming
from someone who matters a great deal to you, the interaction may be more valuable than any non-social
reward. Conversely, there are things that you would find so difficult or
scary or unpleasant that even from a beloved friend, praise/encouragement alone
would not be sufficient; the equation would need to be balanced out with
some heavy duty reinforcements. A trusted friend who was also handing
you $1000 bills could probably get you to work through even some difficult
stuff.
The inherent power of social approbation/interaction is wildly
underestimated by trainers, I think. Dogs tell me I'm quite right about this
one. I often have the same treats as the handler, but what I offer that
the dog finds so intensely valuable is the social interaction provided at a
high degree of coherence & congruity. Everything in me truly says to the
dog that I'm working to connect with him.
Finding the appropriate balance of social interaction plus non-social
reinforcers depends very much on:
a) even being aware that such an equation exists (in my experience, a lot of
trainers seem unaware of the whole concept, or have a very rudimentary grasp of
the concept)
b) understanding it's a delicate balance and highly contextual/situational
c) the handler being able to really "be there" and both willing and able of investing themselves
in an authentic way (dogs do not fall for less). Coherence, congruity and
continuity matter to dogs, just as they do to people. You must be lined
up body/mind/soul with what you're intending to offer the dog by way of
connection with you. Incongruous, disconnected or incoherent
intent/actions will make any intelligent creature doubtful of the value of
interacting with you.
d) the relationship & the social interaction must be valuable to the
dog. People would like to think it is so, but it ain't always so! In some
situations, the social aspect counts for a lot, in other situations, not much.
e) in the case of fear/anxiety, understand that
trust/respect/relationship only go so far. If they went as far as some
trainers seem to think, none of us would be afraid of snakes
or spiders once a trusted & beloved friend showed us how wonderful
snakes
& spiders are! Respecting the fear/anxiety as separate from the
relationship is critical. Understanding that the relationship can be
an important support, but cannot be superimposed over the fear/anxiety
with the plan to 'erase' the fear. (I am always deeply saddened by
people
who say, "If only he trust me more, he would know he was safe" in a
situation where the dog clearly felt anything but safe...)
f) understanding that social interaction can be a serious (and often
unwelcome/unhappy) pressure for many dogs, so it must be used with care and
with respect to what the dog has to say about it. Easy parallel - you're
really worried about something, and a well meaning friend keeps telling you,
"It's okay, I'm here for you, you can do this, it's all going to turn out
fine, here have a cookie, and you're doing great, and we're going to get thru
this blah, blah, blah" non-stop till you want to scream because that kind
of contact with that friend in that moment is just adding to your stress, not
helping in any way however well intentioned the friend might be. Just
like people, dogs differ in what they find supportive. Some find a gentle
stream of information very comforting & useful, others find the room
(mentally, emotionally and/or physically) to think and process makes it easier
to cope. One must actually ask the dog himself what works for him, and
then do that, no matter what your individual preferences or style might
be. While you might like a stream of comfort, he might not; while you
might prefer to be left alone, he may not. Ask the dog!
I use the food to underline "what a great choice!" and to create the
best possible balance in the intrinsic/extrinsic reinforcement
equation.
Obviously, where there is a damaged or unestablished relationship (such
as I
face when working in a seminar setting with any unknown dog), then food
carries
greater weight. And yet even with unknown dogs, I am totally with them
to
the best of my ability. Social creatures of any species do not miss
the
authenticity of someone trying to connect to them, trying hard to
listen,
keeping as tight a feedback loop as can be done in that moment. It's
understood and appreciated. Best, it's always available - a genuine
connection from who we are to who that animal is in that moment.
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